Mamaramma

The Gap

2005-09-02T08:38:00.000-07:00

Is it striking to anyone else that when you see all of the footage at the Superdome in N.O., almost everyone who ended up there is black while almost everyone being triaged at the airport/makeshift hospital is white? Not to diminish their suffering. It is real and tragic and horrible. But this hurricane is showing us what we have always known, but what we rarely choose to talk about. I wish the media would just come out and say it so that we could acknowledge it, and then someone in the government would have to take responsibility for it. Not to preach. I am just as guilty living in comfort with three meals a day, a car, a job, etc... too many toys for my daughter. Cable television for me and my husband. I just want the country as a whole to own up to the epidemic problem of poverty and socio-economic disparity that is all around almost all of us every day - especially those of us in big cities. We have just come to accept it, and I think that's horribly, horribly wrong.

Sorry for the downer. I'll get back to toddler talk very soon.

Rehearsing for her new back up singer job.

2005-09-01T13:35:00.000-07:00

What the...?
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

I Like the Way You Move

2005-09-01T12:28:00.000-07:00

Is it parental pride or plain old neediness that makes me do the things I do. Maya had her first check-up with her new Las Vegan (I have no idea if she's a vegan or not, but I'll make a point to ask next time) pediatrician. She's going down the checklist asking me all the relevant questions - I have no good answers for the questions she asks.

DR: Does she have a good appetite?
Me: No, not unless eating for about 3 minutes a day constitutes a good appetite. (And it's 90% mac and cheese, people. KRAFT mac and cheese. )

Dr: Does she eat green vegetables?
Me: (I'm trying to remember the last time she didn't spit a vegetable out of her mouth of any color) No, not very much.

Dr.: Does she drink a lot of water or juice in the day?
Me: Like, 4 oz. (But she nurses the life force out of me -does that count for anything? I drink LOTS of water a day and still go to bed feeling dehydrated. The water must go straight from the Brita to my belly to my breasts to Maya to her heavy diapers, and sometimes if I've forgotten to hide the garbage, to our dog.)

When it becomes obvious that she's not going to ask me the questions I WANT to answer, I just offer it up.

Me: But she knows, like, 150 words, 30 phrases or sentences, can sing the alphabet song and can count to ten.

Dr: Mmmhmmm. Well, I'm going to send someone in to test the iron in her blood, and then we'll see you again at 18 months.

Then I just feel plain stupid.

Somehow, Maya eked by the whole iron test. She must be getting some from the dog food she steals or she's getting take out at night while we sleep, cause I can't remember the last time she ate anything with it.

After being pricked and prodded, she grumpily tried to fall asleep in the car on the way home which is death to her home nap. So I kept her awake with some OutKast which she LOVES. She sung along, "I like waaaaaayy moooove" and I thought, she's doing OK. But maybe we'll start taking some vitamins.

Vaccination Town

2005-08-30T14:46:00.000-07:00

Hello all. I'm realizing that it was a lot easier to keep up with my blogging life before I had a job! I haven't been able to catch up with most of you yet - and by most, I mean any and all!
I haven't actually begun working yet, but I got a job at a Montessori preschool and Miss Maya gets to go there as well which makes it mucho mucho convenient for me. This week I've been going through the process of getting fingerprinted, licensed, etc. It wouldn't normally take so long, but I have a talent for getting lost, especially in new cities. In Chicago, the lake was always east. THERE'S NO LAKE HERE!
So, forgive me. I know I've been remiss.

Here's a current Maya shot to tide you over:

Who doesn't do her hair?... ME!

Were you wondering where I was???

2005-08-29T13:54:00.000-07:00

It's been a long summer. From Chicago to Montana to Vegas to L.A. to Vegas again, we have traveled like happy, stinky soldiers. Wha? We have only now learned the value of budgeting and the pitfalls of having to drive all over the country with the current gas prices. Maya has grown and grown and grown. She's walking, she's singing the alphabet, she's counting to 13 (seems unlucky to me), she's learning to swim, she's studying Kabbalah... just kidding. Will survived his crazy Teaching Institute in L.A. and came out on top. He was selected out of 600 some people to deliver the commencement address, and is kind of amazing as I always knew he was. Today is his first day of school in Vegas. I've been the tag along support system through the summmer hiking like crazy in Montana and wondering what the hell to do with Maya, Ollie, and myself in West Hollywood, and now finally entering the world of the employed here in Vegas. Ollie doesn't know where she is, and is happy as long as she gets her standard 8 hours of napping a day.

Here are some photos from our summer!

Our first stop on the 3 DAY TRIP.

It's tradition now.

Wall Drug offers many delights...

...though Maya did not find this one so delightful

Miss Maya awakens. I'll have to finish this another time.

we're still here!

2005-06-07T09:08:00.000-07:00

sorry this will be sloppy! i'm at a kinkos in bozeman, mt with a fussy maya on my lap (who took her first steps thursday!) and her happy time is fading fast! we have no internet access where we're staying and when will's not working, i try to spend as much time with him as possible - so getting away to a computer center is difficult right now! Anyway- i miss you all, and so much has happened. we're out of chjicago - drove three days out west where maya and ollie proved themselves to be excellent travelliung companions! stopped in deadwood and had dinner at the gem saloon. here in bozeman, will's working for shakespeare in the parks, and maya and i are getting in as much hiking as possible. it's so beautiful out here - i can't say enough about it. i'll post pictures later - much later. feeling healthy and happy and even a little tan! i'll try to check in soon!

Transition

2005-05-16T20:40:00.000-07:00

Hello all - Well, somehow we did it. We managed to fit a three bedroom apartment into a space that might, in any other situation, make a good sunroom... a SMALL sunroom. That sunroom was actually a Penske truck that is currently parked at some motel in Nebraska with my husband and father in law who are so kindly making the drive out to Las Vegas for the exciting reward of moving all that stuff into a storage facility. Hey! Nobody ever said we don't know how to live. it. up. Some people go to Vegas for the Strip and the gambling. My husband and his dad go for the good times that come with moving large heavy boxes and sleeper sofas.
Question: if what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, are our future masters degrees going to be worth a damn in any other city? What if we have another baby there? I'd like to keep all my children. Thank God Maya happened in Chicago. I just feel so sad for her little brother or sister; I mean, I'm not staying in Vegas forever. I hope they like it!
Now I'm sitting in my parents' basement while Maya probably is having nightmares about this new sleeping situation. She likes the familiar, my friend. She likes the familiar. We're here until Will flies back in on Friday at which point we'll all drive out to Montana. God love Will. Poor guy has to drive 27 hours to Vegas, fly back, and then drive 24 hours to Montana with, very likely, an unhappy baby, an uncomfortable dog, and a wife who will be engrossed in Travel Yahtzee. (Have you tried it? It's addicting, I tell you!)
MOre news at 9:00

Moving

2005-05-12T06:37:00.000-07:00

P5110005
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

Proof positive that things are moving along. Don't have much time to update here, but I wanted to check in and say... I'm not dead! I should have more time to update next week when I'm at my parents' for the week!

Like sands through the hourglass...

2005-05-05T14:43:00.000-07:00

People, time is running out! I love you people - friends of mine in Chicago - but I don't have time to see all of you individually anymore. We have to pack! do you hear me? We HAVE TO PACK! Things are getting desperate around here. We have to take the dog in to get some shots. Will has to take the Praxis and apply to UNLV and apply for financial aid. ARGHH. In addition to Maya, we're watching another little guy every day, and babies don't like to pack! Scratch that. Babies LOVE packing tape, and the crinkly crunching of newspaper around SHARP and DEADLY if dropped martini glasses, but Mamas and Dadas don't like babies to pack!
Apparently, babies don't like to take naps anymore, because as I write this, Maya awakes after 23 minutes of sleeping. More later!

Las Vegas or Bust!

2005-05-02T21:19:00.000-07:00

Two years ago this coming July, things were going pretty well. Will and I had both joined Actors Equity, the theater actors' union, we were both making our livings only from theater, we had lots of time to spend with each other, we just got sweet little dog and named her Ollie, and best of all, I found out I was pregnant. But when you're an actor, and you find out you're pregnant, you also learn that you won't be working in theater again for at least another year. And when you're an actor and you learn that you're going to be a new dad, you start to worry about where the next job is going to come from. Some of the best jobs in Chicago only last 2 and a half months, and that doesn't speak much for job security.

So we found side jobs here and there to help make ends meet, to help prepare for this wonder we now know as "Crazy Maya". We moved into a bigger apartment. Will was able to keep acting while doing some accounting work on the side. We worked it out. We could do this as actors. We could do anything.

Then the most amazing thing happened. Maya was born, and the world rocked a little for us. When I held this 8 pound, 4 ounce little girl on my chest for the first time, I felt the weight of the future. It was decided, then, for us that our lives would forever change.

Will and I are giving up the theatre life for awhile to pursue something that we know will help Maya have a better life in the future. As I've reported here before, we've been accepted into Teach for America , and we've been assigned to the Las Vegas Valley. Will will become a special education teacher this year, and I will join the program next year so that Maya doesn't have to experience the electric shock of having both parents absent during the 5 week training period at the same time, which I hear can go from 6:00a.m. to 12:00a.m. 5 days a week. This is a wonderful program that does everything in its power to help the disadvantaged kids do just as well as their counterparts in the "good" schools. I know we're going to miss our friends, our lives here, and our careers. But to our friends and our careers, we're just saying "Bye for now". To Chicago, we're kind of saying, "So long, sucka!" (We've never really loved Chicago.)

We leave in mid-May for a detour in Montana (MY FAVORITE STATE - DID YOU KNOW???) so that Will can work a month for Montana Shakespeare in the Parks and Maya and I can backpack around the trails and waterfalls. Then it's off to L.A. for 5 weeks of training for Will and lots of thumb twiddling time for me and Maya. (sensing a pattern here?) Then off to Vegas for good in August, just in time to experience the 104 degree average high of August.

I'm not sure what my computer access will be like during this transition, but I will try to keep in touch as much as possible. I'm afraid my picture downloading capabilities will take a big hit.

So that's our story and we're sticking to it. If you've made it this far into this post, all I can say is, "Wow - You like me! You really like me!"

Sorry to ramble on so.

Excuse me, while I kiss this guy!

2005-05-01T21:00:00.000-07:00

Maya has always been very affectionate. I thought it was hunger that kept her suckling at my breast the first night of her life for 4 LONG HOURS. Apparently, it was a need to cuddle. I was a new mother. I was learning. I'm still learning. I'm happy to say that weaning issues aside, she is still a very affectionate and cuddling little girl. WHAT? You'd like proof, you say? Well, lucky you. You've come to the right place. I Mamaramma, hereby present my case.

EXHIBIT A:

Here's a picture of Maya with a playmate. A mobile playmate. Granted, one may argue that she is trying to cull some of his locomotive powers through osmosis, but I think she's just showing a little love.

EXHIBIT B:

Here she is again with the same playmate. He's settled down for a snack, but that doesn't stop her from trying to get a little sugar. Note the surprise on his face. He is not used to such forward women; I can tell.

EXHIBIT C:

Here she is with a younger babe; the daughter of a good friend of mine. OK, the camera is taking a lot of her attention, but she is not so distracted to forget to help support the drooping baby. Cuddling in action!

EXHIBIT D:

AHA! The babe droops some more. Maya abandons fame for a little volunteer work. What a do-gooder!

EXHIBIT E:

Now this is where things get weird. Here she is with another buddy who is younger and more vulnerable. As soon as I let her get near him, though, she attacked. Check out his face. I think he's enjoying the attack! But wait. Things do get weirder:

EXHIBIT F:

I caught this shot while babysitting for this little boy one day. I don't think he knew what hit him. Maya may have a career ahead of her in women's football 18 years from now.

EXHIBIT G:

I think this move is illegal, though.

AND FINALLY, EXHIBIT H:

I should have seen it coming. This is how she was kissing her father 8 months ago.

And there you have it: my bear-huggin' little girl. I wouldn't have it any other way.

Teeny Weeny Weaning

2005-04-27T08:49:00.000-07:00

As we prepare for this life transition, and as Maya Bird is one year and 1 week old now, we've decided that it's time to wean her. Wean her from our love? No. Wean her from our affection? No. Wean her from our near CONSTANT attention? hmmm. Wean her from my breasts? Absolutely.
We have a small problem, though. This child is Willful. And when I say that, I mean that she knows what she wants, and does everything in her power to get it. And I mean that she is just like her father, Will, who knows what he wants and does everything in his power to get it. I've started by taking away her two morning feedings and replacing them with delicious (and insanely messy) peanut butter toast. Somehow, though, breakfast always seems to be followed by the hard skull of my baby crashing full force into my chest, pulling my shirt down as I pull her out of her high chair. "No, Maya, " I say, "Not now." This sends her into a super sonic wail accompanied by the most acrobatic contortions ever witnessed by man. Can you touch your heels with the back of your head? My baby can. Thankfully, she is extra sticky after the peanut butter, and I haven't dropped her yet.
I know this must sound familiar to Those Who Have Traveled This Road Before, but, for me, this is new and painful and difficult. As I write this now, I heat her waking from her morning nap. Time to start it all again.

"Call me!" (THIS POST WRITTEN BY MAYA)

2005-04-25T11:50:00.000-07:00

P4180005
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

nJgv hvvvvvvzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzvvVVvvVVVVVVVVvvvvvvvvvvvvvv avvvvvvvv

Oh Boy! P.S. Happy Birth/Deathday Shakespeare!

2005-04-23T06:49:00.000-07:00

Your Brain is 86.67% Female, 13.33% Male

You have the brain of a girly girl

Which isn't a bad thing at all

You're emphatetic, caring, and in tune with emotions.

You're a good friend and give great advice.

What Gender Is Your Brain?

After so many years of being cast as "Girl-Boy" in various Shakespearian plays and other theatrical ventures, it's been confirmed: I am part boy. Well, I'm hardly surprised. Now, please excuse me. I've got to go adjust myself.

Welcome Back, Ollie!

2005-04-22T13:51:00.000-07:00

Welcome Back, Ollie!!!
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

We just got a call from a college student nearby who took her in last night, fed her, and took good care of her. He was about to make some signs that he found her, but he saw one of our signs first. Thank you everybody for all your good vibes. I am awed by the power of bloggers. I'm ready to start a religion.
By the way, I didn't mention it before, but Ollie is a girl. Ollie is short for Olive Oyl, but I can see why anyone would think it was a boy name. IT USUALLY IS!
I'M SO HAPPPPPPPPY!

PS The weird thing is that before they ever saw the posters, they guessed her name. I don't know how, but the just decided that her name was Ollie, and sure enough...

Ollie, Come Home.

2005-04-22T06:07:00.000-07:00

It was only a couple of years ago that we walked down what looked like Doggie Death Row at the Springfield Animal Pound, looking for a dog to take home with us. Cage by cage, we passed so many aggressive, barking, howling dogs - all angry at their imprisonment. And then we saw you. Sitting quietly in the corner of your cage, there you were looking downtrodden and oh so sad. They brought you in to a special visiting room so that we could meet you, and you were the sweetest dog we had ever met. When we had to leave, you clung to Will's leg as if to say, "Dear God, do not leave me here another day!"
We brought you home to Chicago, and you were a little freaked out by the traffic, but we eventually taught you to sit at each corner before crossing the street. We found out we were going to have a baby, and we joked with you, "You're one lucky dog, Ollie! If we had known about this 2 months ago, you'd be sitting in that cage today!" You didn't think it was a very funny joke. One thing we learned about you is that you love to chase squirrels. Sadly, Ollie, the squirrels seem to be smarter than you, because the only time that you ever got close enough to one to do any damage, it scratched you in the face, and you came inside whimpering. I think I heard the squirrel laughing. I can't be sure.
Lately you have a new trick. When the baby is taking her nap - her short-slept, highly cherished nap - you like to walk by her door and shake your collar soooo loudly that she inevitably wakes up. Well, I outsmarted you! I've started taking your collar off during the day. But Ollie, that backfired horribly.
Yesterday, we accidentally left one of the gates open, and then let you outside unknowingly. My friend Jen was over, and we were deep in conversation, so I didn't realize that you had been gone until 2 hours had passed. Will came home, and he and Maya and I split up (well, Maya went with her Dada. Although she knows how to say "Oyeeee", I don't think she's a very fast canvasser) and searched the neighborhood for 2 more hours, but we didn't find you. I talked to every postal carrier, crossing guard, and dog walker I ran into, and asked them about you, but no one had seen you. We went home and made up a sign, and posted it on trees and lightposts all over the neighborhood last night. We've got you on the hotlist with the Chicago pound. I'm so afraid though, that all of this is too little, too late. Thank God you have a microchip in you that gives your information when scanned. It just makes me sick to my stomach to see your collar sitting here with the little tag on it that says, "My name's Ollie" and gives my phone number. You should be wearing that collar right now. But I didn't want to wake the baby.

Go HERE!

2005-04-20T10:43:00.000-07:00

Does everyone here know how much I love Greenthumb? Well, if you don't, you should really go and pay a visit to Greenthumb's page. It's full of beautiful pictures of the most beautiful plants, people, and doggies you may ever see... again... EVER! Also, Greenthumb was so kind to give me a gift of more uploading power on my Flickr account, and now I can post more pictures like this one:

Thank you, thank you Greenthumb . You've made me one very happy Mamaramma.

The Bird is One!

2005-04-19T05:33:00.000-07:00

Whew! What a long weekend. I'm here to report that the birthday party was a success, mostly gauged by the fact that Maya took a nice long nap and woke up 15 minutes before the guests were to arrive. Then she looked like this:

We realized that her future was probably going to be very bright, and that she might want to wear some shades.

Once that was accomplished, we let the masses in, we ate sandwiches and dips especially prepared for this day of birth, we opened gifts, we killed a cake:

(That part was sad. What did that cake ever do to anyone except be delicious? Ah well. It was a sacrifice to the gods of birth.)
Then we went outside and played made up games with a bouncy ball and a 6 year old on a busy street. The 6 year old in question is my neice, and I don't know how many times I heard, "[6 Year Old] DO NOT GO IN THE STREET! " She went home in one piece, I am happy to report.

All in all, it was a great party. The only sad part (besides the death of the cake that we all maliciously rejoiced over) was that Maya still has a problem sitting on her great grandmas' laps. And that makes them sad. And that makes me sad. We'll have to get them together more often.

Now I must check in with all of you lovely people. How were your weekends?

Checking in

2005-04-15T10:11:00.000-07:00

Hello friends. Sorry I've been out of the blogging loop - I was visiting home for a couple of days and I thought I'd have internet access there, but did not... yadda yadda yadda. I'm back now, and madly sprucing the apartment up for Maya's birthday party tomorrow where there will be 4 grandparents and 3 great grandparents in attendance: all, in my paranoid view, judging my merits as a housekeeper.
BUT - I wanted to let you in on the news that Will and I both were accepted to Teach for America! This means that we'll be packing up our apartment immediately, and after working in Montana for the month of June (to answer your question Homesteader ), we'll be training and then moving to some new town or city for the next two years. Crazy times. I'll fill you in when they tell us where they're sending us. For now, I must find the dust in every nook and cranny of this place and destroy it!

Clothe This Baby!

2005-04-10T09:51:00.000-07:00

It's time to splurge a little. Our Maya Bird's birthday is next Sunday and the party is on Saturday. The girl needs a birthday dress. And some balloons . My questions to you, blogger friends, is how much money does one spend on a birthday dress for first birthday? I'm very cool with going to the secondhand stores in town and seeing what they've got to offer, but sometimes the selection is not so good. The devil may pull me into one of these baby boutiques and dangle some beautiful fine woven fabrics in front of me. We all know I've given into temptation before... of the cake batter persuasion. In this case, I'd be sinning for my child - an ethical quandry! My question is: how much is too much? Keep in mind that summer is approaching, and whatever I get, I expect her to wear EVERY OTHER DAY this summer until it falls off her body.

At least I had a Lean Cuisine for dinner!

2005-04-08T10:09:00.001-07:00

I'm pathetic. Just because we've had two beautiful days of sun and fun, and then the weather changed all of a sudden to (comparitively) bitter, biting cold is no excuse to act like it's time to get all mopey and depressed, and mix up some cake batter just so you can eat half of it raw with a spatula. There's no reason to do that.

But I did.

And it was delicious.

Now I feel uggghhh though. I'm not a waster, either. I baked the other half in a lovely round pan, and iced it with the half container of icing that I'd been spooning licks out of all week.

And then I had some for breakfast.

I'm here to tell you that my baby girl had grapes, spinach, and cheese for dinner last night. She will hopefully develop better eating habits than I have taken on. It reminds me of when I was 7 or 8 and used to sneak downstairs after everyone had gone to bed so that I could eat spoonfuls of margarine out of the Parkay tub.Or when my friend's family took me on a wonderful road trip across the country through the southwest, to California, through the mountains, and back to Illinois again. My parents made me promise to keep a journal so I'd remember all the new things I was seeing. When they read it, it was all about what I ate at each meal, with nary a mention of Mount Rushmore, or the Napa Valley, or Santa Fe. I did, however, remember to mention that my friend Mary and I got McRibs, and you can't always get a McRib every day of the year. Why was I so crazy???

I'm going to leave you now to do some guilt-driven sit ups and the like. Unfortunately, I have to pass by that cake on my way out of the computer room. Oh, you siren, sing to me some more!

I'll leave you with some pictures of my sunny, happy, girl. She's almost a year now!

Save "Save Mouse"!

2005-04-07T10:46:00.000-07:00

Does anyone know what has happened to our little friend, Mouse? I think for a couple of weeks now, his website has been highly dysfunctional. Maybe he escaped and is lounging in some doggie paradise eating piles of Mounds bars... or maybe not. If anyone has any insight on this matter, please let me know!

A Couple of Months Off - It's What They Would Deserve

2005-04-06T09:45:00.000-07:00

We're still waiting to hear about our Teach for America acceptance status. They send out yea/nay's on April 14 and until then it's just a waiting game. If one or both of us gets in, we'll be moving somewhere as soon as June so we'll have to flash into packing action - which should be a joy with an almost one year old - but who said I never liked adventure?
I have reason to believe that Will is more likely to get accepted than me. He's kind of a superstar interviewer in my opinion, and I was there for part of his group interview process, so I saw how well he did. I, on the other hand, was awkward, awkward, awkward. Some examples:

1. In our sample teaching lesson, I decided to teach how to count to simple music. I got the room clapping in time, and then proceeded to forget how to sing "Happy Birthday". It came out of my mouth like a cassette tape was fast forwarding. Who here has ever forgotten to sing Happy Birthday????

2. In my personal interview, my interviewer asked "You've heard how emotionally and physically challenging Teach for America can be. Under what circumstances do you think you might quit?"
I knew that she wanted to hear that nothing would make me quit. That I was a determined, motivated, all systems go under any kind of weather type of gal. But something in me couldn't give a blanket answer like that, so I said,
"Well, death.... Not mine, but if someone really close to me were to die, I might have to quit... (All the while I'm thinking, "Wha??? What are you saying? Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!" But she kept writing, so I felt I had to go on...) I mean. I'm not going to quit because the students behave worse than I expected, or the job is harder than I expected... (She's still writing, what does she want???) but if my husband or my baby were to die, I might have to quit ( GOD - I'm so morbid! she's still writing! This sounds so bad!)...
Or maybe I'd just take a couple of months off."

ADDENDUM!!!
I had to add this Bozeman Police Report from TODAY, people, TODAY:

"A drunken man on North 17th Avenue was "acting like the exorcist" Monday. He was turned over to a friend."

Only in Bozeman

Mamaramma's Confessions Part I

2005-04-04T06:26:00.000-07:00

I have a confession to make. I know that I haven't been updating as much as I used to. I know that I haven't been visiting all of you lovely bloggers' sites as much as I used to, and it's all because of a dark mistress that has come into our lives: cable television. OK - that's not the only reason, but it's a BIG 'UN. It all happened a week ago when we were craving some "live" Deadwood on HBO. It's just so easy. All you have to do is call the RCN number on your screen, and if you're already hooked up to basic cable, as we were, then as soon as you say, "Sign me up." the TV shows all of these wonderful, wonderful shows. From PoweRGirls to Making the Band to Best Week Ever, I can't get enough.
Also, it was my mom's birthday and she and my dad were in town this weekend, plus it's been a lot nicer outside so we've gotten a lot of good stroller time in lately. I know: excuses, excuses, right?
Trivia for you Deadwood'ers: Did you catch that the guy playing Francis Wolcott, George Hearst's gold scout, is the same guy from last season who killed Wild Bill? He's also Mr. Edwards in the Little House remake on ABC, so he's become the new Mr. Western Period Drama. Also, Maddie, the new Madam working with Joanie is the crazy French lady from Lost. These people are getting a lot of work!
To prove to you that my life has not been all television or computer screens, here's a pic from a few days ago:

Kramer did this on Seinfeld tonight in a rerun... only he had gonorrhea.

2005-03-28T19:52:00.000-08:00

Now we all know that the actor's life is a glamorous one, right? Oh yes, my brotha. Now auditorily (is that a word? It is tonight!) imagine a record scratching to a halt. As it does, your focus goes to me, Mamaramma, who tomorrow will be doing another gig of... MEDICAL ACTING!
That's right, medical acting. In my case, I will be playing Alicia Hill, a 29 year old who is 16 weeks pregnant and is a Quality Assurance Technician at Stein Tool and Dye co. Oh yes, and Alicia Hill smokes a pack of Virginia Slims a day. If any of you nurses in training are reading this, umm... don't cause maybe I'll get in trouble for giving the case info away.
I did this last year when I was 8 months pregnant (so was Alicia Hill), and my character still supoosedly smoked a pack a day, and let me tell you, it is not fun to be lectured over and over again by all these nurses in training about how you're possibly going to have a low birthweight baby because you're an irresponsible mother to be. I kept wanting to scream, "It's not me! It's this Alicia Hill! I don't smoke at all! I never have!" And if I had ever smoked, I would have quit if I were pregnant. Now, the cocaine, that's another question.
So tomorrow, as I pile my glamorous self into a car at 5:30a.m. in my fat clothes cause Alicia Hill is also supposed to be fatter than I am, and if the nurses are on top of their game, they'll lecture me on that one, too - think of the glamorous life actors lead. All for $15 an hour. And a babysitter costs $10 an hour.
Can I steal from Susie? WHAT WAS I THINKING???

This post is just like reading People Magazine's StarTracks!...sort of, not.

2005-03-24T19:22:00.000-08:00

David Letterman just had a kidnapping scare. Some lunatic in Montana (my favorite state - no offense to other valuable governances, it's just where my heart hangs its hat) was apparently plotting to kidnap his toddler, Harry. On the Late Night show Monday night, Letterman tipped his hat to the people and sheriff's office of Choteau, MT, where his ranch, estate, mansion - whatever! is, where the officials brought this lunatic in, and where Will, myself, and some other folks once presented Shakespeare's "The Tempest" to a gracious audience of about 100 on the lawn of a retirement home in a horrible windstorm - some might say, a Tempest! (Does that win the award for the longest run on sentence today?)
Anyway, all this reminded me that Choteau was where I had one of my celebrity sightings- so now may I present for you... (ahem) (*trumpets and fanfare*)
MAMARAMMA'S CELEBRITY SIGHTINGS

1. In college, I went to see Mr. Holland's Opus at the Biograph Theatre in Chicago, Waiting in line to see the movie was one Emo Phillips, the comedian.
2. Also, in college, during the first season of Friends, my friend was in a play produced by some graduates of Northwestern Univeristy, David Schwimmer's alma mater. He was at the cast party, but sat in a darkened corner and wore sunglasses the whole time. Give me a break! I hear he's a big jerk. You can tell me if I'm wrong.
3. My first summer touring with Montana Shakespeare, we played this beautiful resort area, Chico Hot Springs. At the pool/grill, we saw Meg Ryan, pre-divorce, leaving with her kids. Some German little girls asked for her autograph and she obliged.
4. My second summer, my parents were visiting in CHOTEAU, and we all went out to breakfast at a little restaurant. When we got up to leave, Ed Harris and his wife,Amy Madigan were seated at our table. My dad about had a heart attack.
5. My third and last summer touring MT we were back at Chico Hot Springs, and this time Dennis Quaid, post-divorce, and some blonde hottie actually came to see our show. We were doing the Comedy of Errors, and I think I drove him away, He left before the first act was over. I had later reports that he was drunk and caused a ruckus in the dining room. He sped off in his Cadillac Escalade.
6. Also in Montana, in Bozeman, while waiting in line to see the movie Signs, we saw Michael Keaton and someone I assumed to be his son. They saw the movie too.
7. Finally, this fall when Will was doing his show in NYC, Little Bird and I spotted Blythe Danner and classy lady friend walking down the street. I was excited, but the New Yorkers I was with were so been there, done that.

That, my friends, concludes my list. It is useless, but I had fun remembering!
Have a wonderful evening, morning, afternoon - whatever!

Exhibit A: Minor Mobility Achieved

2005-03-22T15:23:00.000-08:00

Exhibit A: Minor Mobility Achieved
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

Mayabird, she of 11 and a half months, has refused to crawl, refused to sit up from lying down, and refused to roll over more than one way. She will, however, do a 5K around the apartment if you hold her little hands. After a crappy day of interviewing yesterday, this is what I was so happy to come home to. I've devoured those cheeks on more than one occasion, but they keep growing back!

In response to a few comments about homemade babymaking from a couple of posts ago: you don't even need a craft-kit - most people have all the tools they need right around the house: Easy!

Tag Along

2005-03-21T13:51:00.000-08:00

Skin tags, sale tags, blog tags, they're all the same! Greenthumb "tagged" me with this, and being the benevolent creature that I am, I'm going to comply. OK, Greenthumb, I'll play your little game, but after this, you owe me some Ding Dongs! (just kidding)
1. What book would I like to be?
Pride and Prejudice
2.Have I ever had a crush on a fictional character?
Marius Pontmercy from Les Miserables (the book, not the musical)
3.What is the last book I bought?
don't remember... well, I bought a book for Will for his b-day. A non-fiction book about genocide - does that count?
4. What is the last book I read?
Pride and Prejudice
5.What am I currently reading?
Buzz Buzz Busy Bees, Noisy Nora, Hairy Monkey (I have a baby - this is my curriculum)
6. What 5 books would I take with me if I were stranded on an island?
Anna Karenina, Les Miserables, The Red Tent, Grapes of Wrath, To Kill a Mockingbird
7. What 3 people am I going to tag and make answer these questions and why?
I think everyone's been tagged already!

Family Photo in Browns and Reds: well, it was Thanksgiving!

2005-03-18T09:07:00.000-08:00

Family Photo in Browns and Reds: well, it was Thanksgiving!
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

Hello - have you met Will? Will's my super-smart, super-talented, super-cute husband. (Check out that crazy Adam's Apple!) He and I made this baby you see here, but we adopted that dog to the right. We don't know who her parents are, but they must be of the canine persuasion. This isn't the best picture of all of us, but it's the only one, believe it or not. Maya's sporting a nice Last of the Mohicans hairdo courtesy of my mom.

I feel pretty, Oh so pretty. I feel pretty and witty and BLECCHHH.

2005-03-17T19:58:00.000-08:00

I feel pretty, Oh so pretty. I feel pretty and witty and BLECCHHH.
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

In honor of Bad Hair Self Portrait Day. Once again, I arrive late to the party, but how can you turn me away when I look this awful? That'd be kicking me while I'm down. Hey, I brought Cheezits. Does anyone like Cheezits? What? This is a dessert party? Man! Stupid! Stupid!

Is there a pet psychic in the house?

2005-03-16T15:35:00.000-08:00

I don't know what happened. I just spent about thirty minutes writing a dissertation about how our dog, Ollie, needs a little bit of counseling - and it's gone, completely gone. I'll quickly give you the highlights as I don't have time to recreate the whole thing:

1. Our dog can't be left alone for any real length of time (i.e. 3 hours)
2. We must Ollie-proof the apartment when we do leave.
3. If we don't I may find my cheesy, used breast pads shredded all over the floor. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, they smell like gruyere after awhile, which is why I now have a hard time with the whole Swiss family. I wonder if another woman's old milk would smell like cheddar. Ah well, a subject for another time.
4. We made the mistake of RUNNING ERRANDS today - were gone too long.
5. Came home to find our bed sheets shredded - like a crazy murderer had been there - or like Freddy Krueger, who, when analyzed, fits into the category of crazy murderer.
6. They were really nice sheets - a wedding gift - and I now know that I can never have anything nice.

Case in point: My old favortie shoes.
We were driving to a birthday party for a friend, and I had made the cupcakes. They were precariously balanced on a tray that I carried in my lap when we were rear-ended. Icing was everywhere, including my shoes. I thought it was funny, so I took a picture:

I made the mistake of leaving them out overnight. I thought nothing would happen. We were home, and Ollie's not crazy when we're home, right?

WRONG!

Baby's awake!

Ramblings

2005-03-14T09:46:00.000-08:00

I should be preparing for my Teach for America interview right now instead of hanging out on the computer, - (well, I'm not on the computer. That would be uncomfortable!) - but I'm having a hard time motivating myself. Listen, I washed the dishes, made about a kazillion animal noises looking through THE BIG ANIMAL BOOK with Maya til she fell asleep from all of the excitement, put on some 5lb. ankle weights and walked around ( that should burn about 5 calories!), and listen, I even took. a. shower. Now, if that's not a full day, I don't know what is!
Confession: Forgive me myself, for I have sinned. I tried to stay away from the coffee this morning like we talked about, but it CALLED to me. It's New Mexico Pinon coffee, and it is d.e.l.i.c.i.o.u.s. In penance, I will probably do nothing.
Bye for now.

The jig is up.

2005-03-12T08:42:00.000-08:00

I don't feel like I have anything to hide on this blog. I make it a personal policy to not write anything about anyone that I wouldn't tell them personally. Nevertheless, the only person who knows about this thing is Will, my husband, and now my friend Jen - hi Jen!
Jen came over last night for some pad thai and cosmos. She doesn't have a computer at home, so she was checking something online, and discovered this blog left up on the screen. Initially, I was embarrassed. It was like being in 8th grade thinking you're alone at home singing at the top of your lungs to some Jodi Watley song and having the cute boy down the street hear you through the open windows. AGONY! But then I thought, wait a minute, I have nothing to hide.
So why am I still a little embarrassed? Does anyone understand this feeling?

Late Edition

2005-03-10T15:46:00.000-08:00

P3090040
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

Busier today than usual - here's my late contribution to Self Portrait Thurs...

It's over.

2005-03-09T11:46:00.000-08:00

Dear chocolate cake,
What a day it's been! You were brought over here last night by a friend, your mom, and she just abandoned you and the plate you rode in on. I don't know how a mother could do that, but there you are now, on my kitchen counter, making those sad eyes at me. Listen, I had some of you last night, and you were delicious, you really were, but we just can't be together all the time. I want my freedom. I starting to see this new salad, and things look like they might work out so... What's that? You're cold? I know I didn't even put any saran wrap around you last night. It's cause, OK, I confess, I wanted you to dry out. I wanted you not to look like you would taste so good. Dammit! It's not working. Why don't I just throw you away, you ask? Well, I don't know. I have a hard time committing. Sometimes, I think maybe I'll just stick my finger in your buttery icing, and just... No No No. Don't do it. I'm gonna do it, chocolate cake. I'm gonna throw you away. It was fun while it lasted, but I've got big dreams, and I don't want anything holding me back. Besides, I've got a date with pizza tonight. No, you don't know him.

Spokesmodel

2005-03-08T09:21:00.000-08:00

P2210025
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

Maya decided to don some of the merchandise from the Montana Shakespeare company that we are so fond of. I think she should be paid for such enthusiasm!

Ghost Story

2005-03-07T14:50:00.000-08:00

I hate ghosts - not ghosts themselves, but the idea of them. I hate the idea that there is someone/thing that is so restless it has to "haunt" a certain place forever, or really for any length of time. It's just creepy to me. It also brings up a whole slew of afterlife questions that don't jive with my perfect vision of afterlife: reincarnation or heaven - NOTHING ELSE.
The summer Will and I were married, we were on tour with a Shakespeare company in Montana. We traveled to a new town almost every day, and two thirds of the time, we would be put up in hotels. The other nights, people from the community would put us up. As the newlyweds of the company, we often got the best homestays. Sometimes there would be a bottle of champaign in our room. The people of Montana are wonderful. Let me say that again: THE PEOPLE OF MONTANA ARE WONDERFUL.
But there was one night. We were in a tiny little town practically off the map. The town sponsor decided who would be sleeping where, and as a TREAT for us, the newlyweds, she decided that we would be staying in the haunted Bed and Breakfast.
To make a long story short, after brushing past all the headless mannequins in wedding dresses, we were shown our room. I made Will promise not to fall asleep before I did. I was not interested in meeting the former town residents that evening. Will kept his promise. BUT. I woke up in the middle of the night. No problem, I thought, I can handle this. I'll just roll over and fall back asleep. I don't need Will to fall back asleep. So I rolled over, and there, lying next to me was a 20 something woman with strawberry blonde hair cut in a bob. She said, "Why are you afraid of us?" At that moment, I felt a mixture of TOTAL FREAKING-OUTEDNESS and embarrassment. I didn't want to hurt anybody's feelings, living, dead, or undead. "I'm not!" I said. It's just that I'm not used to the whole idea." She went on, "You know when you're reading a book..." I interrupted her. "Hold on." and rolled over. "WILL!!!!" I started shaking him awake. He woke up, and I told him what happened, but even the next morning, I couldn't be sure if it was a dream that woke me or the strawberry blonde lady herself.
The next morning we went down for breakfast lovingly made for us by the 93 year old proprieter. "How are you doing this morning?" we asked. She replied, "Well, if I were any better, I'd be... DEAD."
!!!

Warning

2005-03-07T09:52:00.000-08:00

Dear Will,
Why, oh why, do you have to touch me with your feet? Don't you know that your feet touch the floor? Don't you know that we have a dog, and that that dog rubs her anus on the floor when she licks herself? Don't you know that when your feet are not touching the floor, they are bound in socks and hiking boots, possibly producing copious quantities of sweat... sweat that sticks to the dog hair that's been shed on the floor? I love you so much. I love every part of you. I even love your two alabaster white feet. But that doesn't mean you have to touch me with them.
Now you think it's funny and that means, my friend, my companion, my past and future - that means you are e v i l. Next time you bring those things near me, I will cut you.
Love, Me

Of Pride, Prejudice, and Dolls in Houses

2005-03-05T09:57:00.000-08:00

For the last two months, I have been working with two high school classes as an Artist in Residence from a theatre here in town. The juniors wrote a modernized scene based on Pride and Prejudice, and the seniors rehearsed the last scene from A Doll's House, but set it in three different time periods: 1879, 1946, and 2005. Every Tuesday and Thursday, I have taken over their English class, and gotten to know them better. Where at first, they seemed like young punks just waiting to stomp on any shred of self confidence I walked into the room with, by the end, they were "my kids", my cohorts. Thursday night, we presented these scenes to about 200 people at the theatre I work with. Their teacher, their families, their classmates, and their friends all came out to support them, and they were so good. I can't even tell you. We may even have a future actor or two in the bunch. Anyway, this isn't as much of a tribute to them as I would like it to be, but here they are: my dedicated, amazingl, talented bunch. You were wonderful, and I'm going to miss you all. And thank you [junior who played Darcy] for wearing your own zoot suit to the performance. THAT ROCKED!

I'm sorry this isn't a better photo - you deserve better!

2005-03-05T09:25:00.000-08:00

P3030017
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

These are only a few of my actors; my other pictures were even worse. I love you guys!

Self Portrait Thursday

2005-03-03T10:01:00.000-08:00

P3020033
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

My first contribution to SPT: Oh, Nikon D70, how I wish for you so!

The babysitter cancelled...OK, there WAS no babysitter.

2005-03-02T09:56:00.000-08:00

Miss Maya had her first audition last night. We drove out to the burbs to this theatre, running late as usual. I was the last one scheduled for the day. The director was this sweet older woman who took Maya out of my hands as I walked in and said, "Here Darling, I'll take the baby. You run to the bathroom and get yourself ready. Then you and Jonathan will talk about your music." She was so authoritative that I did what she said, even though I didn't have to go to the bathroom. But I went anyway. It was like being 7 and having your mom MAKE you go to the bathroom before you drove to Grandma's. I came out and Maya immediately started crying to be back with me, so that's how we did things; I got up on stage with Maya in my arms, sang my uptempo, sang my ballad, and finished the audition. The whole time Maya kind of crooned along with me. It was so much fun! I hope I can do every audition like that - it sure takes the nerves away: having something so much important than this piddly little moment in your arms. But Maya, I am SO GOING TO BLAME YOU if I don't get cast.

So far so good.

2005-03-02T07:07:00.000-08:00

So Will and I found out last night that both of our applications were accepted and we're now invited to a day-long interview later in March. So I guess I better get off my butt and start preparing something! If this works out for one or both of us, we'll be out of Chicago by summer. Good. That's what we want.

Waiting

2005-03-01T12:17:00.000-08:00

I'm going to start using real names now. I figure I'm not saying anything I wouldn't say to anyone, so why not?

Anyway, Will and I both applied for Teach for America last month, and today is the day they send out notifications letting you know whether or not they want to see you for an interview based on your essays and resume, etc. It's usually a job that recent college grads apply for, but us being actors who now have a baby need to really quickly turn into people who have insurance.
I'm also getting ready to go to an audition in one of the suburbs an HOUR AWAY - hopefully to get cast in a little musical that would give me the privelege of driving TWO HOURS A DAY to get to the show. But we need some kind of employment for April when Will's show ends. We need to be people who have insurance!
Wish us luck.

By the by, Little Bird's real name is Maya Wren (hence the bird reference). I still call her Little Bird at home though. I love her so much.

It was like meeting Hansen

2005-03-01T08:34:00.001-08:00

In the World of Embarrassing Stories, I just remembered one that made me cry.

My husband and I met while touring with a Shakespeare company in beautiful Montana. One summer, we were out at breakfast, and a family came over to our table to say hi, that they'd seen the show, etc. etc. Anyway, they stayed in my mind because 1) I found out that the mom and I had the same birthday and 2) they introduced us to their little girl, Jack. She was a pretty little girl with long blond hair about 8 years old. Anyway, it was a pleasant encounter. Back in Chicago, months later, I would tell W. that if we were to ever have a little girl, maybe we should name her Jack, cause that is just too cool.
Fast forward a year later. W. and I went to Montana to visit friends and to see the shows that year. While waiting for the show to start (it's an outdoor theater), the SAME FAMILY came over to us to say hi. I was so excited to see them because I remembered them! We've met a lot of people touring Montana, and from year to year, it's hard to remember faces, much less names. But THIS family I remembered. The mom had the same birthday as me, which happened to be THAT DAY!
"Happy birthday!" I said.
"Wow! You remember!" she said.
"Sure, I said. And I also know your name is Jack - cause I told my husband that if we ever have a little girl, we're going to name her Jack!"
"Except he's a boy."
pan over to little 9 year old boy looking anguished that I just called him a girl
"Oh, of course."

The conversation ended without even the standard niceties. They walked away. I wanted to die.

I wonder if Jack has gotten his hair cut yet.

Million Dollar Papa

2005-02-28T07:16:00.000-08:00

Is it wrong of me to think that Clint Eastwood is one of the sexiest men in America? I wish I looked as good at 28 as he looks at 74. Mr. Eastwood, I nominate you to share the Sexiest Man Alive award with my husband, who, if asked, would agree with me. Just give me a call to accept. I'll be here.

In general

2005-02-27T12:11:00.000-08:00

OK - It's up to 6 nights in a row, and after tonight, it will be one whole week of our new lives with a crib-sleeping baby. And they said it couldn't be done! OK - I said it couldn't be done. It's nice to prove myself wrong.
In other news, I'm prepping for my first audition in a few months for a little musical that would help pay the bills if I were to get cast. Right now, we're staring at the abyss of unemployment come the middle of April when W.'s show closes and his night time tax season job ends. It's nice to have a sugar daddy, but the sugar's gettin' low, my friends. Maybe the theatre gods were waiting until LB could go to sleep in her crib before they let me be castable.
How's everyone else? Right now, I'm feeling pretty good.

Shaken, not stirred, please

2005-02-25T09:59:00.000-08:00

I haven't talked about this until now because I didn't want to jinx myself, BUT, I have gotten Little Bird to go to sleep in her crib BY HERSELF for the last 4 NIGHTS IN A ROW!!! And this is without crying, without Ferberizing! I don't know which gods to thank, but thank you all god of sleeping and babies and mothers' sanity, and yes, to all the gods that have now allowed me to make a cosmo every night and enjoy it in peace. If this triumph is any indication, my life should be getting a whole lot better. I probably will be offered some fabulous Broadway job without auditioning soon - I mean, this is THAT BIG! I love you, Little Bird, but right now, I prefer sleeping without you - and it's nothing against you; your breath doesn't smell, you don't fart in bed - or if you do, it doesn't bother me, and you're not really a cover hog, but girlie girl, you have the potential to OFFEND in all of these areas. Let's say we're helping each other out. Now, is it too early for a Cosmo?

Not Puss in Boots

2005-02-22T08:21:00.000-08:00

P2210022
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

Introducing Olive Oyl - but you can call her Ollie. She's a good girl and will wear her little boots when it's muddy and rainy outside. Thank you Ollie.

What's your secret?

2005-02-21T17:32:00.000-08:00

Bird Bath, Part 2

2005-02-20T10:12:00.000-08:00

P2180001
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

I love her little socks!

The results are in!

2005-02-18T16:21:00.000-08:00

That went very, very badly. Can anyone see what I'm doing wrong?

H.ell T.o M.y L.ife (HTML)

2005-02-18T07:28:00.000-08:00

< HTML >
OK. So I'm experimenting with HTML, and I'm not doing so well. < B > See what I mean? < / B > Do you have to have these crazy spaces? I don't get it. < BR > Let's see how it went.

< / HTML >

Here I am!

2005-02-16T22:00:00.000-08:00

PA310002
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

Not quite in line with self portrait Wednesday, but I'm new to all this, and will need some time to catch up. Please, forgive me.... What's that??? You do?! Oh, I knew I could count on you.
This picture is from Halloween. Little Bird went as a Sheriff. There's her outlaw she's done strung up. The sign says, "HORS THEEF". This was ultimately less disturbing than the costume W. wanted her to don: "Baby with a Vestigial Twin."
Happy Wednesday

RUINER

2005-02-15T10:31:00.000-08:00

So did anyone do anything romantic for Valentine's Day? W. made me a Valentine's Day mix CD and tried to have it play as our alarm yesterday morning. Little did he know that I had messed with the alarm clock before we went to bed, wondered why it was on CD mode and turned it back to buzzer mode. So I woke up to a buzzer, and then the sound of my lovable husband fumbling around with the machine at 6:45a.m. Finally, OutKast's "Happy Valentine's Day" started playing, and I was 100% unappreciative, mumbling, "What's that? Why is it playing? What time is it???" Ahhh, another romantic attempt runied again. Ladies and gentlemen, I am a RUINER!

Screaminggggggg

2005-02-14T20:02:00.000-08:00

I'm sitting here listening to my baby scream because we're trying to have my husband put her to sleep instead of me nursing her down all the time. It makes me wish we had done this months ago, and gone through the hard times then, instead of NOW! Or, it makes me wish that my husband had some boobs with milk in them, too. Men and women are not equal, ladies and gentlemen. Oh yes, Happy Valentine's Day.

Just asking.

2005-02-12T10:40:00.000-08:00

So, we're ready for a change in our lives. A major change - along the lines of moving from Chicago to Montana. Some things are up in the air as of yet, but may I ask - does anyone have any recommendations for a former actor/non-certified educator who is trying to find a new career path so that her daughter won't grow up wearing burlap and eating mealworms? Or if not, do you have any good recipes for mealworms?

Bird Bath

2005-02-09T06:20:00.000-08:00

P1010010
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

Aftermath II

2005-02-08T10:09:00.000-08:00

P2070001
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

Aftermath

2005-02-08T10:08:00.000-08:00

P2070003
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

Well, it's been a very long weekend. I've been planning a surprise birthday party for W. for the last 3 weeks, and never mentioned it here in fear he'd discover this blog. I'm so glad it's over. Too tired to write much today except to say that the party went off well, and if anyone needs some Bud Light or some Breton crackers, we've got scads. Oh yes, and olives, too. Costco has provided me with far too many olives. Mmmmm, aren't you getting hungry now?

Spinach

2005-02-04T12:51:00.000-08:00

P1230003
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

Little Bird has a thing for Popeye...
and a thing for spinach. She's strong to the finisch.
We were watching an old Popeye together where Popeye has to take care of Sweet Pea for the day while Olive Oyl cleans. All sorts of chaos ensues and at the end, after Popeye has handed Sweet Pea back to Olive, he sings, "There's no if's or maybe's - I'll never have babies. I'm Popeye the Sailor Man!" (toot toot) Classic.

Bozeman, MT: My Kind of Town

2005-02-03T08:37:00.000-08:00

I thought for fun, I'd share some of my favorite Police Reports from the Bozeman Daily Chronicle with you, the internet. These are absolutely true. They are partly what make Bozeman, MT the town for me!

€ A man on Railroad Street in Logan said someone had broken into his home and given extra water to his dog.

€ A man was vacuuming out his car at a West Main Street business Thursday. The business owner said he could only use the free vacuum if he paid for a car wash. The man said he would buy a car wash after he vacuumed his car, but that never happened.

€ Two men apparently got into a fight at a North Seventh Avenue gas station Monday. One man began assaulting another man with a squeegee, then fled the scene.

There are oh, so many more, but we'll leave it at that for now.

Little Bird

2005-02-02T07:01:00.000-08:00

P2010012
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

Of Plagues and Pleasure

2005-02-02T06:51:00.000-08:00

Last night was the best night of my life.
Our Little Bird discovered Ring Around the Rosey. You know - that old Black Death-era ditty that rhymes about the sores people get from the plague, how they put poseys in their pockets to mask the smell, and then they all fall down and DIE? That one.
We've been working with her on her gross motor skills since she is perfectly content to sit in one location and have us bring her toys all day long. So, last night, we started singing that song, holding hands and standing in a circle. Well, she was standing. Her father and I were towering over her on our knees. After making her fall on her butt about 27 times, the spirit took over in her, and she wanted to do it herself OVER AND OVER AND OVER again!
Every time she'd fall down, she'd grab my hands again and try to pull her self up, then sing in her babbling way, and fall down way too early - somewhere during the line: Ring around the rosey. So yeah, pretty early.
It didn't matter.
She had learned how to fall down on her butt (a major step, really). And she was singing.
At one point, while we were singing, she pointed to the rings on my finger. I said, "Yes! Rings!" And then I caught myself and said to W. with disappointment, "Oh, Man! Now she's going to think this is a song about rings on your finger."
As if I'd want her to picture the REAL rings this song was about.
Ah, beautiful beautiful Black Death.

P1210001

2005-01-31T22:31:00.000-08:00

P1210001
Originally uploaded by Mamaramma.

Little Bird with her favorite beau, Popeye. My witchy hand holds up the drunken sailor.

The Hairy Feet of Time

2005-01-31T21:41:00.000-08:00

Now I'm slightly embarrassed about what I said in the previous post. Hello again, it is I, Mamaramma. Doesn't that sound like some kind of Super-Savings-Dollar-Store for all things Parental? I really, really , really don't want to shop there.
What happened to all the time I used to have in my life? Can anyone answer that? Do you remember being 5 years old, and being told that you were going to the Waterslide Park later on that day - so you'd ask, "When?" and your parents would say, "In 5 hours." and you wanted to DIE because you'd never get through five HOURS!!! FIVE HOURS was an ETERNITY, and you could hear the second hand on the grandfather clock beating in your eardrums for FIVE HOURS?! Then finally, 5 HOURS passed, and there you were at the Waterslide Park, and some teenager kicks you in the eye while you're wating for your best friend to come down the slide behind you. But it wasn't your friend behind you, it was some teenager with hairy feet who teaches you the lesson that you shouldn't stand so close to the edge of the slide while teenagers are coming down it at 20 mph. Anyway, it was wonderful- and practically a whole other day as far as a five year old is concerned.
Now one week doesn't last as long as those anxious five hours, and there's hardly any time to even think about getting a haircut. OK - I do think about it. All the time. So sue me. I think about my little girl, though, and wonder how long she thinks a day is. To her five hours must seem like 5 months in the inflation of time.
To me, five hours goes by as quickly as being kicked in the eye by some hairy-footed teenager.

Welcome... to me

2005-01-31T01:00:00.000-08:00

Hello out there in the great internet universe. It is I, hereby known as mamaramma saying, "What's going on?" I was just inspired by www.dooce.com and thought I'd try my hand at this. While I'm supercritical of everything about myself, including, but not limited to, my writing, I'm comforted by the fact that probably no one will ever read this. Well, no one I know, at least. If they do, ummm..., hi.
About myself: I am a first time mom of a beautiful baby girl - I'll call her Little Bird - she's 9.5 months old now which means that she's spent as much time in this world outside of my belly as inside of it. So congratulations to her for that. I'm married to a wonderful man who loves me despite my bouts of craziness and supercritical nit picking fests, and who is basically supporting me and the aforementioned milk consumer singlehandedly. Until Little Bird was born, I had been making my living off of acting here in Chicago, but that all came to a grinding halt with the need to stay home with L.B.
My husband is also an actor who is morphing into a teacher, and if all goes well, we may be spending the next 2 years in South Dakota on some impoverished reservation teaching for the pubic schools there... that's if all goes WELL! I need to morph into something quick, and maybe this will help me figure it out.
So... we'll see where this goes.
That's all for now.